Here to Show You: Commentary (by Paul Sehnen)

"Here to Show You" marks my first attempt to compose a song for guitar and voice. Lyrical and musical phrases of some of my other songs may have been on my mind before I started composing HtSY, and a couple of my songs may have been completed before I completed HtSY, but my starting HtSY was the first instance of my sitting down and consciously attempting to create an integrated song for guitar and voice.

HtSY is easily identified as the first song I started, as the lyrics of the song are about my attempt to make the transition from one who plays the music of others to one who sings and writes his own music, as well as the inspiration behind that attempt. Back in 1996, shortly after my first classical solo performance of December 1995, I found myself in a turbulent romance with a dancer who belittled and challenged my artistry. In an especially hurtful exchange, she said something to the effect of the following: "At least I feel the music I dance to; your playing just reflects memorization."

Her criticism stung so badly because deep down I was afraid that it was true. Many fellow players on the coffee house circuit may have been intimidated by my ability to read sheet music, but from my perspective this positive was offset by a rather large negative, my reliance on sheet music as a crutch, and my attendant inability to play by ear, or to improvise on the spot with other players. Especially since my heart was more in rock and blues-rock and jazz-rock than it was in classical. Not that there aren't classical players who can play by ear or improvise, but these abilities did not come to me naturally, and my classical training did little to help me in these areas.

Someone somewhere in my musical past once told me that a key to playing by ear and improvising on the guitar, was the ability to sing, if not competitively then at least enough to carry a tune, so that the vocalizing of sounds could be used as a bridge between hearing or imagining a musical idea, and then playing it back on the instrument. True or not, this advice spurred me to enroll in vocal training. I do not recall any serious expectation of becoming a competitive singer back at the beginning of those lessons, especially since prior to that point I was so awkward vocally that I rarely even sang for myself in solitude let alone in the presence of anyone else. My stated goal at that time was to pick up some basic singing ability in order to improve my playing ability; if I so happened to develop actual marketable vocal ability, well then that would just be icing on the proverbial cake.

My vocal lessons were often painfully embarrassing, but as I struggled through them and began to improve I also learned something, namely that singing produced an even greater natural high than did playing. At that point I began to entertain the idea of singing "for real," not just as a means to improve my playing. When I began writing my own music for guitar and voice, my first order of business was to defy that challenge spoken to me by my girlfriend back in 1996, hence the subject matter of the lyrics of HtSY.

In the music of HtSY I intend to convey both the pain of the challenge, and the determination to overcome that challenge. So the music has both a churning feel and also a feel of defiance. I cannot point to any one song that influenced me to write this one, although musically speaking it is quite possible that I drew inspiration from a few great arpeggio-driven guitar tunes including "Don't Fear the Reaper" by Blue Oyster Cult, and "I'd Love to Change the World" by Ten Years After. Not to mention a handful of Metallica tunes.